Body Language

How can a person show his affection to another person without telling him or her? And how

can one know that he or she is indeed attracted? Body language. One’s body language is an

obvious way of telling someone how he feels and what he wants to say. Your eyes, facial

expressions, and body movements can truly express that you want to engage in a romantic or

intimate relationship with another person.

What The Eyes Could Say

The eyes are strong indicators of romance and attraction. They can express, flirt, and even

seduce much more better than words. Eye contact may not mean anything if it only happens

briefly. But once it lasts longer and with an intense look, he or she is definitely into

you. Winking will also work, but it does requires right timing. Another strong evidence of

attraction is when one would catch your eye, then look away, then back at you again. But, if

he or she would look away and never look back again, it is a clear sign that he or she is

not interested.

Smile And Facial Expressions

The smile is one of the greatest sign that he or she likes you. It means that he is truly

interested, comfortable, and enjoying. But make sure you know how to determine a forced

smile from a sincere one. Raising the eyebrows, although unconsciously done, has also been

observed to be done by people flirting with each other.

Magic Of Touch

Sometimes, leaning towards another is just not enough. Closing the distance is much better.

A light tap or stroking of the arm could send electric signals to another person. Most of

people would pretend that there is a smudge on the face or lint on the clothes just to have

a reason to touch.

Difference Of Men And Women

Compared to men, women can send signals of attraction five times stronger. They have more

flirting habits than men and most of them are done intentionally. They love to preen, play

with their hair, tossing the hair over the shoulder, and play something with their hands

such as a wine glass. Most women are also quite good in seduction and teasing men,

especially when they involve their lips. Biting and licking their lips, putting on lipstick,

eating or drinking slowly are the usual moves of an interested woman.

Meanwhile, men usually try to appear masculine to show their prowess to the women they like

by giving them a look at their full length. They would try to stand taller, square their

shoulders, and sometimes hook their thumbs into the belt for that macho aura. They also

unconsciously touch their ties or collar, and this means they find you irresistible.

Signals Of An Invitation

You would determine if a person likes you if he or she would give the following signs:

prolonged aye contact, raising of eyebrows, smiling back, laughing with you, leaning,

closing the distance, imitation of actions of the partner, touching, preening, and the like.

If you received these signs, it means there is a big possibility that you could take your

interaction to a higher level.

Signs Indicating “No!”

A person is most likely not interested when he or she never glances back at you. You can

also determine that person is starting to get bored or uninterested in you when his or her

eyes start to wander, sigh, yawn, have a passive or neutral facial expression, and the like.

The signals of body language in terms of romance and attraction are easy to detect if you

know how to interpret one’s actions. Understanding gestures and body movements of another

person can definitely help you know in advance if you can be intimate together or be

rejected.

Body language is a form of communication wherein one would use the areas or parts of the

body to convey a message. It involves gestures, facial expressions, and other body

movements. It is an essential part of communication since words alone is not enough to show

one’s meaning, ideas, or emotions.

There are many gestures that our complex body could make, and each one have different

interpretations. However, there are times when a gesture does not necessarily reflect or

show what you intend to say or feel inside.

Interpretation of Handshakes

Handshakes have many meanings and is used in different situations. It is used when greeting

others, meeting new people, or closing a deal or agreement. You can use handshakes to make

good impressions. You can show that you are confident by giving firm handshakes, with your

hand pointing downwards and your arm extended. On the other hand, a weak handshake with the

hand pointing upwards would indicate that you are shy, uncomfortable or nervous.

The Eyes and Their Secrets

The eyes, small as they are, have big meanings and indications behind them. Eye contact is

one of the strongest eye language that one can use to say that they are interested, sincere,

and attentive. Lack of eye contact and inability to prolong it may mean that the person is

lying, hiding something, or is becoming bored or uninterested.

The eyes can also perform vertical and lateral scans or movements. Vertical scan is wherein

the person may be checking out the whole appearance of another, from head to toe. This is

typical in meeting other people to gain the first impression. The latter, lateral or

horizontal scan, may mean looking from one eye to the other or checking out the

surroundings.

Looking form one eye to another may mean discomfort and can be straining; thus if you want

to make an impression that you are holding eye contact, you may opt looking at the bridge of

the nose of the other person. When doing this type of lateral scan then to the forehead, it

indicates that you are talking to someone with superiority. When looking from one eye to

another then to the nose, you are talking to someone in the same level of status.

You’re eyes can also express different feelings or state of mind. The act of winking is a

signal of agreement or flirtation.  Glancing means a moment of desire for the specific

object. When one squints at what you are saying, it means that he is analyzing if you are

telling the truth. When one wants to get away from the world even for a moment and think

deeply, he would tend to close his eyes. And if the eyes would widen, it is a signal of

shock, surprise, or disbelief.

Arms Crossed Across The Chest

Crossing the arms would mean differently depending on who is talking. If you are the one

talking and the other person crosses his arms, it means he does not believe you or was

insulted by something you said and uses it as a barrier of defense. Meanwhile, if he is

talking with his arms crossed, it may mean that he is hiding something from you or simply

feels cold.

Other Gestures And Movements in Body Language

Nervousness, anxiety, and lack of confidence can be shown when you put your hands in your

pocket, slouch, fidget, drum your fingers on the table, rock or shuffle your feet, and the

like. Thus if you want to give a good impression, try to avoid these gestures; although most

of the times they are subconscious actions.

Understanding and knowing how to read body language of other people can give you the ability

of interpreting another person’s thoughts, and you will be able know how to react

appropriately.

When interacting with somebody you are acquainted with, you must learn how make a good

impression. Your body language would speak much louder compared to the words you are saying.

It is essential to be careful of one’s actions towards another, since this may either

strengthen the bond or ruin it due to offensive, rude manners and gestures.

Personal Space

Everyone of us has his own personal space. We must respect each one’s personal space,

otherwise it is an invasion of privacy. A person usually has a large personal space when

around a person she does not know, but it will get smaller once he will get to know that

person.

Greet With A Handshake

A handshake is always a nice way of greeting, whether in formal or casual circumstances.

Show confidence and interest in the one you are greeting with a firm handshake. In shaking

hands, it is important to make an eye contact and accompany it with a slight sincere smile.

Make sure your hand is pointing downwards, since pointing the hand upward may indicate

awkwardness and hesitation. See to it also that your palm will come in contact with the palm

of the other person.

A handshake is also a safe method of greeting somebody. Some countries find other forms of

greeting awkward and unacceptable, such as kissing and hugging.

Gestures To Avoid

Avoid gestures that might offend the other party. Avoid rude hand and arms gestures such as

placing your hands into the pocket or on the waist, crossing the arms across your chest,

drumming your fingers, tapping your hand or foot, fidgeting with objects, inspecting your

fingernails, and propping your chin onto your hands.

Also avoid turning or leaning your body away from the person. It shows that you are very

eager to get out of the situation you are in. Watch your posture as well. Avoid slouching or

a sluggish posture. It is interpreted as lack of interest or boredom.

As much as possible, do not break the eye contact and look at other objects or people. This

is a sign  indicating that you are distracted or your attention is already somewhere else.

Show Interest

Show the other person that you are interested in your interaction or conversation by showing

signs that you are a good listener. Maintain eye contact to show that your focus of

attention is on that person and in your conversation. Lean towards him and nod your head

from time to time.

Be Sensitive To His Body Language Too

In interacting with another person, observe his or her actions as well. He may be oblivious

to his body movements, but he may be telling you that it is time to end the conversation.

These are the kinds of people who find it rude to be the first one to end the conversation.

Thus be sensitive when you are with other people; they might already be bored or annoyed.

Culture: An Important Factor

Consider also the culture of the person you are conversing with. There are countries with a

very conservative culture, especially those in Asia. They may be very sensitive to the

gestures you perform. Even if you do not intend showing rudeness to other people, you still

have to be cautious of your actions.

Communication will never be effective without body language. Words only make out 7% of the

communication process and speech particulars (voice, intonation, pacing) make out 38%. The

rest of the 55% comes from the body gestures, movements, and facial expressions.

The first signs of attraction that a person usually sends to another comes from the body,

not the mouth. Actions do indeed speak louder than words. Body language is significant in

attraction because most of us are hesitant in telling our inner feelings. So why not let our

bodies speak for us?

Common Signs Of Attraction

One can show his or her attraction to another person through eye contact. A brief eye

contact may not mean anything, but if it would last longer than it should, it may be a

definitive sign of attraction. Note if he would look back as well. Even though your eye met

for a few seconds but if he would not look back again, it means he may not be attracted to

you.

Simple gestures of smiling and closing the distance between both of you are strong signals

of attraction as well. That person would tend too lean forward or the direction of his or

her body would be towards you. Touching from time to time is also a way of showing this

feeling; sometimes he or she would accidentally brush against you just to have that physical

contact.

The Most Attractive Body Language

A confident body language could always attract anybody from any gender. It is rare for

somebody who prefers a person with a poor posture and mishandled gestures; these signify low

self-esteem and lack of self-confidence.

Show confidence by giving a firm handshake, maintaining a good posture, and proper use of

gestures. These reflects a high self-image. Develop these practice of body language, and you

will be successful in meeting new people.

Difference Of Men And Women

Men and women definitely have different ways of showing each other how they feel. Women

usually show more obvious signs. They would try to make themselves look more attractive by

adjusting their clothes, smoothening the skirt, and the like. They would twirl or play with

their hair, cross and uncross their legs, and rock their leg back and forth with the sandal

hanging on the toes. These are playful gestures but they are effective signals of

attraction.

On the other hand, men would show their prowess by showing off their masculinity through

their “macho” posture. This posture is done by standing taller and squaring the shoulders

back. Some men would hook their thumbs into their belt to emphasize their masculinity more.

Unconscious gestures done by men when interacting with the person they are attracted to

include touching the tie and raising the eyebrows.

It Could Be A Waste Of Time

After giving hints that you are into this person, how would you know if he or she is not

attracted to you? A person, consciously or unconsciously, could give signs saying, “No. I

really am not interested.” If a person can’t tell you directly through words, then look for

signs from his or her body language.

Lack of eye contact, forced or fake smiles, frequent sighing, looking around except at you,

and the like – if you are given these signals of annoyance or lack of interest, then

consider it as a waste of time.